6 of the Greatest Superpowerless Superheroes - Dangerously Genocidal


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Tuesday, 30 May 2017

6 of the Greatest Superpowerless Superheroes

We know Superman – faster than a speeding bullet, nigh indestructible – and radioactive spider-ly empowered Spiderman. We know Thor, and Hulk, The Fantastic Four, all of the mutants from X-men… To say there are a lot of powerful superheroes is an understatement, and we love (almost) all of them. But, surrounded with all these amazing abilities, it’s often hard to forget that some of the greatest ‘superheroes’ are just ordinary people who have some pretty awesome skills or weapons. Here are:

6 of the Greatest Superpowerless Superheroes

1. Tony Stark, Iron Man; Marvel

Come now, let’s be honest. He’s Tony Stark, Iron Man. He needs no introduction, save to say that he is a “genius. billionaire, playboy, philanthropist”, and only because that’s his own words – although we suspect ‘superhero’ can now be tacked on to that. He is an ingenious engineer, who entered MIT at the age of 15 and boasts master’s degrees in electric engineering and physics. He’s the perfect combination between the sexy cool guy and the basement nerd. In the comics he also pulls a bit of a ‘Bruce Wayne’ and no one suspects the playboy to also be the powerful Iron Man – although I’m sure many would agree that the cocky Marvelverse version suits him much better. That being said… read the comics. The stories are insanely brilliant.

But despite his ingenuity, and an awesome flying suit that can apparently withstand a beating from Thor himself, Tony Stark is still very much a regular human being. He may have electronics just about everywhere, but that doesn’t change facts: Iron Man is an awesomely vain bastard in an overpowered suit of armour.

And we love him for it.

2. Bruce Wayne, Batman; DC

You can’t talk about the one playboy and not talk about the other (although, in our personal opinion, Tony pulls it off with a fair bit more style). He, too, is described as the billionaire, playboy and philanthropist, although what he lacks in genius – that’s what he’s got employees for – he makes up for more than enough with his fighting skills. Batman is also one of the greatest contradictions in comics – he serves almost as a force of anarchy in his vigilantism, but despite often being depicted as one of the darkest and most brutal heroes he has such a stringent moral code that he never takes a life.

He might have lots of awesome gadgets (and what fan hasn’t wished for their own batarang?) but aside from his armour, nothing really gives Batman a leg up against his enemies in one on one combat.

That is all Bruce.

3. Hal Jordan, The Green Lantern; DC

Okay, so Green Lantern has some of the best powers ever. He’s almost invulnerable, he can fly, and manipulate the energy of his own willpower to create just about anything he wants – from comically large hammers to… well, anything he wants or needs at pretty much any point. What makes Hal such a great Lantern is the fact that, as a person, he has exceptional willpower. In fact, seeing Hal as the Lantern it’s easy to forget something very important: he’s just a man.

Although his willpower makes him a great Lantern, it’s the Power Ring that makes it possible to save the Earth in his creatively cocky way.

4. Hank Pym and Scott Lang, Ant-man; Marvel

When it comes to the awesomeness of Ant-Man, you have to talk about Hank Pym before you can talk about others who took up the mantle later. Hank was a Biophysicist before he was anything else, and then he created the suit to become an epic mystery solving superhero, later on joined by his girlfriend Janet, who became the Wasp. From lab coat wearing genius to founding member of the Avengers – you’ve got to give the man kudos.

Scott Lang took up the mantle later, after Hank decided to explore alternate identities such as Giant-Man, Goliath, Yellowjacket and Wasp. He started out as an engineer, although he became a burglar when it just wasn’t exciting enough anymore. Yeah, he was caught, but he was such a brilliant engineer that Stark International hired him to install the new security system in the Avengers Mansion (now wouldn’t it have been fun if that was in the movies?). Originally Scott stole the suit knowing full well what it was, and doing so to save his daughter’s life with the full intention of turning himself in to Hank – but the good Doc made him Ant-Man full time instead.

Like the others, Ant-Man’s ‘superpower’ of growing and shrinking, and talking with ants, all stem from the use of a brilliantly engineered suit. It’s his ability to think creatively on his feet, though, that makes Scott worthy of this list.

5. Walter Kovacs, Rorschach; DC

Walter Kovacs, a.k.a. Rorschach, is one of my personal favourites. Walter isn’t the type of guy you’d even give a second look; in fact, he’s described as quite ugly, looking like a homeless guy who always carries a “THE END IS NIGH” sign. Nothing about the average height, scraggly man would even hint at him being a crime fighting vigilante. Even Walter considers himself ugly, and thinks of his mask as his ‘true’ face. Many even consider him mentally ill – and with a past like his, that’s not hard to believe.

What makes Rorscach both brilliant and feared is that is moral code is absolute. As far as he is concerned it’s black and white, and no grey space in between. His own unwillingness to compromise leads to his death when he orders Dr. Manhattan to kill him, as he refuses to be part of Veidt’s (Ozymandias) conspiracy.

But what makes him a highly effective superhero is that he has a near unbreakable will, even in the face of overwhelming odds, peak physical strength (for a human), an almost unnatural sense of timing and precision and exceptionally resourceful – he’s shown as being capable of turning just about any every day item into a very effective weapon. He’s a gymnast, a boxer and a pretty good brawler on top. He’s even described as “tactically brilliant and unpredictable”. Hell, the only real gadget he has is a gas powered grappling gun – he’s not nearly as dependent on suits and weapons like the others on this list.

He is, undeniably, super by simply being the most badass human crime fighter he can be.

6. MCU Natalia Romanova/Natasha Romanoff, Black Widow; Marvel

If we were going strictly by the Marvel Cinematic Universe, Black Widow would be deserving of a bona fide position on this list. Trained in a Soviet Red Room to be a highly effective assassin, Black Widow is adept at nearly every type of martial arts, and one heck of a marksman. She’s got the skills, she’s got the tools – and, as we can see in the movies, she’s got a creative streak that trumps all of the gents combined. Who else would attempt to talk the Hulk down without so much as a single piece of supersuit between her and those big green fists? Without a doubt, MCU Natasha deserves a spot here…

Unfortunately, the original Black Widow is a lot more like the Cap than you’d think. Black Widow – or Natalia Romanova – was born in 1928 and given a serum that was very similar to Captain America’s. She also doesn’t age, and has the same super-human strength and agility. She was trained by Bucky (yes, Winter Soldier Bucky), and she was the one who brainwashed Hawkeye to help her kill Iron Man – before becoming one of the good guys, of course.

Let’s be honest, though – Black Widow is a great superheroin, no matter how you look at it.

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